It's been three years since I've updated. That's a long time. I finally figured out how to remove the picture of Omi and Nagi, and I'll just leave the title the way it is for now, althought it's a bit ridicuous. Here I will write about Gothic Lolita in Japan, and hopefully provide some useful information about life as a lolita in Tokyo.

Enjoy your loli life in Japan, she told me. I had just come from a tea party (in Kabukichuo of all places). I won a prize for "best princess." Of course I was happy with my prize; I need all the praise I can get. But something was wrong. There I was with messed up hair, mediocre make-up, and clothes from Bodyline. The skirt was too short (above the knees), and being that is was Bodyline, the quality was far from Moitie. I had to buy shoes and a purse just for this event and things didn't seem to match too well, although everything was black and white. Anyway, there I was in the only (cheap) loli clothes I had ever owned and my name was being called. I had won a contest. Every other girl had probably spent twice as much time and money on her outfit, so why did I win? I have blonde hair and blue eyes. In a way, I am naturally the ideal lolita. Or maybe I won because I am new to their group and they want me to feel welcome. Either way, I was called a living doll several times and treated as such. Sure, I was happy. But I also felt bad- everyone else looked so elegant, and I felt rather awkward and sometimes out of place. It was a beautiful, surreal place, and I had a wonderful time. But I wonder- would I have won the contest if I were Japanese? What if the hair was a wig and I wore blue contacts, like some of the other ladies?

I want to speak to these people, but I can't right now. My Japanese is really pretty bad. So maybe by the time the next tea party rolls around (hopefully I'll be invited), my speaking ability will be improved. Time to study.

It's been a while. I don't care. After I got my A in witchcraft I began sitting at home all day doing nothing. Or so it seems. Now that James is in Florida and Daddy has his broken shoulder from a nasty car wreck, I'm home all day sleeping and getting pills and soup. I bathe, toss on another night gown, and wallow some more. SO...tomorrow I might actually get to get out of here, go to Concord Mills. James will return tomorrow night, although I don't know how he feels about me anymore. I cry a lot because of that slob. It's okay though, b/c I might get away for a few hours.

I had a lovely day. James bought me some daemonettes and some Inu Yasha. And I bought him some GTO. It's our two-year anniversary and I cried again. I've been spending too much money...but I did get a pair of pants for 5 dollars. James bought me some clothes too. Woo! I'm tired of people who act depressed just for the hell of it. I'm tired of people that think they know me. No one really does. I set off some snakes tonight, and the rednecks across the street were having a drunken extravaganza. I dislike people that make me feel as if I have to write every sentance the same way I would for one of my professors, for one of my stories. I'm so tired sometimes; I don't care if I'm told I make no sense. I'm going out with James again tomorrow. I feel crappy, but I had a good day. Mother's back hurts so bad, and I've been very upset over it. Other than that, I'm ok. Slothy, but Okay.

It's past one; I just got up. I was dreaming about me at school. And it was almost Halloween. I feel Genki today. I want to go outside but it's too hot. I want to watch me some anime. Mommy bought me the whole Arislan set the other day, maybe we'll watch it later. The video store decided to sell all of their anime; each video was only 4 dollars. I'm still tired though. Ano...now I'm bored.

sexy sexy feet

I know a girl. She looks like Lord Slaanesh, minus all the sexiness. I don't like people that call me 'poetic,' say I have no eloquence,' say I can't write, say I'm ignorant. They can't call me two-faced. They can make me cry. I feel disgusted. I hate people that make me feel like I have to proofread ever word to make myself seem half-way intelligent. People that assume too much. I'm not a happy person. I don't take my misery out on everyone else. I don't like people that do.

I just got home from the beach...I'm sooo happy. I wanted to log-on and write over the weekend but the few moments I had on the puter I spent looking at Gackt. I never knew my grandmother could be so amused by j-rock. I never knew people could find Hide's death so amusing either. I feel so horrible, but she was so funny. My mom wants to kick Mana's ass. I'm not sure if I would want to stop her or not.
I went to yard sales and got James dear two glasses and I got a bunch of free crap, weights since I'm so weak, and a Beautician's model head. They haven't laughed so much in so long. I never know my darling $1 head would be so hilarious. I had a better time than I thought, even though driving around looking for nautical gift shops is boring.
Kay gave me a TON of books. woo-hoo. Comunist Manifesto!!
I got anime posters (1 for james) and manga and some thing with Koaru on it. ....sexy....
I wanted to go home though, I was moaning the whole way.
me: "Chocolate....Crawford....Chocolate....."
mom: "we're almost there..."
I got my chocolate, and Brad's now my wallpaper. The trip there was so much easier...I slept the entire time.
Ack...so tired. Must go rest ^_~
Ja

Hahaha!!! I got 5000 dollars. College is FREE. Woohoo. Speaking of which, poor Mayu has to study for exams. ;_; I hope you do well! ^_^
I just hope I can keep my damn 3.0. My witchcraft class is coming up soon. Yah! And this Thurs I go to the beach with mum while daddy goes to New York. I hope I'm not bored there. Atleast I'll be forced to draw. ^.^
~~~~~~MalakumaxRiis~~~~~~

James-san came over today, fed me blueberries, watched 1/2 of Mothman, got scared, went home. I can't think of any movie that scares me...Wimps. I'm probably going to spend the night as his house tomorrow. I got to think of somethin to do. mmm...Nilla wafers. My life is so boring. I'm so arrogant.

I was reading my old diaries from high school. There were quite a few trends in my writings: 'I'm so naive, I'm so depressed, I love [Josh], and many vulgarities and descriptions of killing people. And I thought I was sick now. ^__^ Atleast I'm not convinced of my naivete. Overall I conclude:
ICP and Marilyn Manson- not good for mala
Anime and Yaoi- good for mala